You’re in charge, but does anybody really understand you? How do you know? Everybody has their own forcefield when it comes to engagement, if someone perceives something to be irrelevant or simply bullshit, then it won’t make it through their forcefield. So what methods are there then to ensure that the message containing your leadership vision, guidance, and direction gets through? Well, there are plenty, but everyone has their own preferred method of engagement, and you, the leader, need to be aware of these preferences and develop the self-awareness needed to understand how you are being received. The technique you develop to manifest your team’s shared consciousness should be multifaceted, as well, because you want to prevent single points of failure when developing your ability to convey and engage.
“Leaders cannot abdicate their role as mentors…leaders build other leaders.”
“It's not you, it’s me.” The story of my life - that hard exterior just isn’t welcoming. I don’t feel like I have an “RBF” (“Resting Bitch Face”) but most of my professional interactions usually result in an initial reluctance to engage. Being a remarkably fit man with a Special Forces (SF) background is intimidating apparently, which at times can be a draw back. This is a particular point of self-denial, since Special Forces should be able to do what they do because of their ability to develop relationships. I know this about myself now, but it took time to break through the disbelief that I was not “likable” simply because of my demeanor and profession. So, I had to change my approach in the private sector. I like to get to know people now, business takes a back seat and I’m the first to engage. But SF prepared me for this all along because this issue harkens back to the Special Operations Forces (SOF) Imperatives, particularly “Understanding the Operational Environment,” which I would argue includes self-awareness.
How do you generate momentum when attempting to engage your team? You have to inspire them. Easier said than done, I know, but if you’ve hired and arrayed your team according to a vision and a set of values that you consistently apply, you’ll gain that following. Keeping momentum shouldn’t be quite as hard as getting it started, but don’t fall into a common leadership trap. Leaders cannot abdicate their role as mentors by expecting the human resources (HR) department to grow and manage talent; HR manages documents, leaders build other leaders. A bureaucratic organ never inspired anything or developed talent through mentorship. It doesn’t drive purpose or read people and teams to optimize their efforts, HR sits and waits for customers. Wouldn’t you much prefer the boss coming to you predictably for professional development? Leaving professional development to the blindness of bureaucracy leads to cut-throat actions by the unguided to survive. On the other hand, how do you think a team guided to collaborate and support one-another would turn out? Likely with a unified organization that fulfills the leader’s vision. I experienced exactly this sort of cut-throat environment as a Special Forces team leader, mentorship was non-existent and officer management was extremely poor as the leaders were too interested in jockeying for their next position. People followed because they were paid to, not because they were invested and committed. I learned by observing closely, doing the opposite, and by identifying that a leader should inextricably be a mentor.
“So long as team members use their (engagement) preferences to the organization’s collective advantage, it really shouldn’t matter how they engage, simply that they do.“
Have you ever just been in the flow? It’s awesome, you achieve focus and blast through that checklist - maybe those leaders I described above were there – but the blinders come on when you slip into that groove. Don’t allow this to distract you from engaging with your team members. I’ve seen where leaders focus on the “up and out” so to speak, everything that externally affects the team and deputies focus on the “down and in,” or everything internally affecting the team - a great technique, in my opinion. Despite the great technique, I’ve seen it go awry because the people on the team were forgotten. It’s a great way to divide up workflow but the key is not to lose sight of the people despite the up and out focus. While the deputy concentrates on developing systems and processes, the leader still needs to know and cultivate the team’s dynamic to effectively make decisions affecting it.
So those personal preferences we talked about, what could these be? Well, maybe Jim prefers communicating through email and Jane really likes to engage with colleagues over the phone. So long as these team members use their preferences to the organization’s collective advantage, it really shouldn’t matter how they engage, simply that they do. When you learn about your colleagues by taking an active interest in them, since they are an investment by your company, you figure out the avenue they use best to communicate. Then, when you engage, they will actually absorb what you convey instead of tuning you out. Engagement also involves more passive forms of communication, like creating your leadership vision and establishing your values then posting them so that all know, and all can reference your intent. Passive as it may be, leaders need to be proactive in creating these basic empowerment mechanisms early and ensuring accessibility to them because team members will understand your expectations. A well-understood intent will provide a team the flexibility to go and do and not always have to ask for permission, resulting in business multiplied.
Crazy enough, an engagement disrupting issue I’ve run into quite a bit is that people just don’t know what the hell they are talking about. Do you ever think that despite your best efforts at explaining something, that sometimes, team members are just talking past each other? Not that they are stupid, necessarily, rather there is just not a common understanding of what is being discussed. A common lexicon could fix this problem, though not without reinforcement through official guidance and subsequent mentorship. The military does a great job of creating such a lexicon through its doctrine, though it still relies on its leaders to ensure the understanding. In Special Forces, I have routinely worked with foreign partners to achieve America’s strategic objectives, and none of that would have been possible without my lexicon and an ounce of patience. Before the first round was fired at the range and before setting foot in the woods, we confirmed understanding regarding key functions in English when that was the working language and in the local language, when necessary, with dictionaries on standby. The office should be no different, a fundamental result of engagement should be that everyone exists on the same page.
“You are simply more effective and creative together - get together at a park for a hike to get to know one another“
How comfortable is remote work? Very… so much so that it’s hard to be on the same page, the comfort is a huge disruption. At least for leaders it is disruptive, because getting the team on the same page is a massive challenge when non-verbal communication is missing in your engagement. You cannot develop as a leader over Zoom. In fact, even as a seasoned leader, it is difficult to lead remotely. Most times, you simply manage because it is tough to compete with the distractions of home. More than once I’ve called people to discuss business and heard the sounds of Walmart in the background when they should have been manning their computer; this simply degrades trust. The idea of authenticity in interaction, depending on your perspective, either goes out the window or allows team members to truly be authentic as they keep their time online as short as possible to get back to watching their streaming service. Individuals will inherently seek out their own efficiencies and will not spend the time to chat and get to know others via an internet connection. Someone in charge may be able to loosely manage a remote dynamic but certainly herding cats over the internet is not a successful leadership or team building model. You are simply more effective and creative together; getting together at a park for a hike to get to know one another and build team resilience can’t be beat in this pandemic environment.
Engage in dialogue early and as often as necessary to manage the shared consciousness. Setting the tone by publishing your inspiring vision and managing expectations with your intent should set positive conditions including seamless operation between colleagues for your organization’s shared consciousness. Don’t be discouraged if some people are difficult to engage though, something stimulates them, and this will help you tap into your creativity to break that forcefield. Could you imagine how empowering it would be for your team from day one to see meaningful forethought of vision and have insight into what the boss is thinking that’s effectively reinforced?